Jessica Au, Cold Enough for Snow

 Jessica Au, Cold Enough for Snow

Rilke wrote a famous assertion about distance and intimacy, which one can find all over the web and also quoted in a zillion books: “Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue, a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky.” When I was younger, I wanted to argue with those “infinite distances” (probably I still do?), but now I wonder about seeing “the other whole against the sky.” Do the distances between us help us see each other?

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Elena Ferrante, Days of Abandonment and The Lost Daughter: Hypnotic Intensity

Elena Ferrante, Days of Abandonment and The Lost Daughter: Hypnotic Intensity

The first time I tried to watch the movie version of The Lost Daughter, I stopped about a quarter of the way through: the level of emotion felt unendurable. I’ve since talked to at least a couple of friends who stopped and never went back. But I couldn’t get it out of my mind, so I read the novel, took a week or so to recover, then watched the rest of the film. Both versions still recur to me, a few months later, and with so much happening in life and in the world, I wondered what makes them so hypnotic, how they can feel so strange and dreamlike (full of actions no reasonable person would take) but also touch home for so many of us."

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